Darla's Mom

I am writing this is DarlasMom.com because I want to keep it long after FaceBook decays.

1. I am glad I finally decoded “Respect your parents” down to a concept that I can explain to my youngest daughter.
She asked me what it meant and I said “Respecting me means Mommy needs you to have blind faith, take an emotional leap, and believe that I know what I am doing and that it is good for you although you cannot see the whole picture. Respecting me means not fighting when I am trying to teach you things that will keep you safe and make your life better.” There is a part in the story of Job where God gets miffed and tells someone that if they don’t believe that he is making the best choices, that they should pick up the sword and rule the universe. Darla and talked about if she would like to be the Mommy and make the rules, and she said “No” because she can’t drive or see the top of the stove so she wasn’t equipped to take care of herself. “Then trust that I love you and am dedicated to taking good care of you and don’t be bratty about it – that means Respect.” I should also tell you that the song “RESPECT” is playing in my head now so I may have to go see my friend and complain that her brother’s song is in my head – love me some Otis!

2. I am thankful that I feel very uncomfortable listening to people tell story after story about how pleased they are to be mean to their family members as a means of controlling them. If I identified with them and cheered them on, I would feel like a monster. I am glad that I don’t (often) feel the need to bully, harass, or be domineering to be heard and have my views weighed and responded to. This is at home and work and with friends – I am thankful that I feel respected based on the qualification that I really care about people, that my people know I will like and love and be here for them no matter how stupid their choices are and that I can feel validated by other means than being mean. MEan posple suck and there is just no nice way to tell them so.

3. I am thankful for space: emotional and physical space. I am thankful that I can put myself in Time Out and not be confronted with people who are distressing me. I am thankful to live with Darla and that although she likes to supervise my privacy and “Watch you be alone”, that she is sweet and kind and will hug it out when she has her feelings hurt